Legato's Story From The Stall Next Door
by EvilVashTSClone
Summary: Ch. 10!!!! Lookit me!!! I got another Chapter!! I am the greatest go me go me ahahaha i mean it only took me how long? ahahaha
1. Vashu oh Vashu, where for art thou Vashu...

EVTSC: I'm back! And I still don't own Trigun!  
  
A/N once again I forgive for any OOCness that may and most likely will occur. But I must start somewhere, so why not at the beginning? Once again forgive the OOCness! I will not say this any more so you may read my little ficy.  
  
. Yay. She shut up.  
  
.^^ We have returned to crush you spiders that still remain!  
  
-_\\ And it's still my show!  
  
REM: Long ago in a galaxy far away  
  
KNIVES HOLDS UP A SIGN THAT READS: LEGATO'S SUPBERBLY SUBLIMINAL SHOW THAT TAKES PLACE INSIDE A BROOM CLOSET.  
  
LEGATO Master. That is not where I chose to film my wonderful human tormenting show.  
  
DOM: Actually we have moved inside a stall, to many complaints. They all said that the cat kept hitting on them as they washed their hands.  
  
KNIVES: It is that demon cat pet of a spider that caused this. HE POINTS TO HIS FACE Look! My face! The Pain! HE HAD A CUTE LITTLE CLIFFORD BAND-AID ON HIS RIGHT CHEEK. He scratched me and caused me to bleed.  
  
DOM: Sit on it Knives.  
  
LEGATO: Never disobey my Master woman!  
  
DOM: .. You still aren't over that?  
  
LEG: No. And I shall never be, as you say, over it.  
  
DOM: That's why you'll never get laid.  
  
LEG: That hurt.  
  
KNIVES: Enough from the nose bleeders. LOOKS AROUND THE STALL.  
  
WW: What?  
  
MILLY: What's the matter Mr. Knives?  
  
MID: STOPS PLAYING HIS SAX. Yes, what seems to be the problem?  
  
KNIVES: It seems that my brother, nor the crazed spider is present.  
  
THE DOOR OPENS. ALL WAIT EXPECTENTLY. REM COMES IN WAVING.  
  
REM: Hello everyone.  
  
ALL FROWN.  
  
REM: What seems to be the problem?  
  
KNIVES: Why is it that every spider asks the same unintelligent question over and over?  
  
WW: Just to annoy the tar out of you.  
  
KNIVES: Tar? Since when did you stop cursing?  
  
WW: Since last we met and Milly and I had Vash Stampede Wolfwood.  
  
MILLY: HOLDS A BUNDLE IN HER ARMS He's a new member to our cast.  
  
DOM: Maybe he'll make a better Vash than the last one did.  
  
REM: Congratulations Milly.  
  
MILLY: Thanks.  
  
KNIVES: Nothing could replace my dimwitted brother. Nothing, no spider I know, is dumber than he.  
  
LEG: You have a point Master. Also, any new Vash would not take as lightly being shot at and verbally abused.  
  
KNIVES: True. True. But! Where is he?  
  
MILLY: Maybe he and Sempai ran away together. SHE LOOKED DOWN AT VASH WOLFWOOD AND MADE GURGLY NOISE AND THE BABY RESPONDED HAPPILY.  
  
WW: Maybe he found a better paying job. And was finally able to get away from you losers.  
  
DOM: I'm not a loser. Maybe the rest of these bums, but so not me.  
  
LEG: My Dominique you are quick to accuse the Master of such harsh remarks.  
  
DOM: .  
  
KNIVES: Someone just tell me what happened to Vash.  
  
REM: I've also noticed that Meryl, the one thing that stopped Vash from obsessing over me, seems to have vanished also.  
  
MILLY: She went back to work for Bernardelli.  
  
LEG: And yet you chose to stay here?  
  
MIL: Yes. I couldn't leave Mr. Priest. Then Vash Wolfwood was born so I decided that it was best to stay and live like a family.  
  
KNI: But that still doesn't tell me where my hippie love and peace, donut eating, skirt chasing, cry baby, brother disappeared to.  
  
MID: Did you try the donut store?  
  
KNI: Yes! I searched every place that Vash could possibly be. Then I came here hoping he would be here.  
  
DOM: Well you were wrong.  
  
LEG: The master is never wrong! HE MAKES DOM CHOKE HERSELF TILL SHE IS BLUE IN THE FACE. Forgive me for my sarcastic ness.  
  
KNIVES: Vash! Come out; come out where ever you are!  
  
-End part 1-  
  
EVTSC A new beginning!  
  
.^^ Where's my brother? Has anyone seen my brother?  
  
. If you ask me I don't miss him.  
  
-_\\ The furniture no longer has donut crumbs crusted into it! 


	2. Come Home Vashu!

EVTSC: I don't own.  
  
.^^ Spider, Spider, Apple Cider!  
  
Legato's Stories from the Stall Next Door.  
  
EVTSC: Welcome I am the voice from above! I am the author! I am the introduction person now! Rem lost her job as this! And look I get it now!  
  
LEGATO IS PERCHED ON A STOOL AND REM SITS BESIDE HIM  
  
LEG So.  
  
REM Welcome one and all! We have a new show, a new location, and a new co- host!  
  
LEG I personally regret this.  
  
KNI I miss my brother. HE POUTS AS HE SITS ON THE GROUND  
  
REM Don't worry Knives. If I know Vash, he'll be having a moral dilemma any moment now.  
  
LEG But it seems he hasn't had one in a year.  
  
REM That's just a technical difficulty. He'll have one, if I know my Vash right.  
  
KNI You don't! I do!  
  
WW I know him better! Ya baka's! I was stuck around his not so old love and peace era. Now who knows what it'll be.  
  
MIL Personally I don't think anyone here knew Mr. Vash that well.  
  
ALL STARE AT HER IN DISBELIEF.  
  
REM You know maybe Milly is right.  
  
LEG Well there is a first for everything.  
  
MIL If only Meryl was here to witness it. SHE HUGGLES OVER HER 8 MONTH OLD CHILD VASH STAMPEDE WOLFWOOD.  
  
WW Ye.  
  
REM Well on with the show.  
  
KNI I cant. It's not the same.  
  
LEG I know. Vash was always the one to set the psychotic mood for us all.  
  
ALL EXCEPT REM Yeah.  
  
REM Well fine then I'll do the show by myself I don't need any of you!  
  
DOM Great that means.  
  
MID More time to.  
  
MIL Conduct a world wide Vash search!  
  
WW Great idea my honey!  
  
LEG Sounds interesting. Then the master will be able to blow some spiders up on the way.  
  
KNI Its not the same. Vash isn't here to scold me.  
  
DOM I can leave this forsaken waste land!  
  
MID I can play to have them donate money to our save Legato's show fund.  
  
LEG And if they do not donate then I shall force them or better yet to make the master happier he can torture them or blow their town up!  
  
DOM Great idea. Then who might tell us if they've seen the blond dope or not.  
  
MID She's got a point there Mr. Legato.  
  
KNI It's alright I just aren't up to killing spiders with out Vash telling me its wrong and I shouldn't do it.  
  
REM Well Knives, I've told you all those years ago that you shouldn't be mean and should love all things.  
  
KNI But I knew you were a mere stupidly wrong spider that needed to be taught a lesson.  
  
REM Well.  
  
LEG Fine. Mundane woman Rem. You stay here and host the show from here.  
  
MIL Oh and can you pay the bills while we are gone?  
  
REM I guess but  
  
MIL Thanks. SHE GRABS A FEW THINGS THEN THE DIAPER BAG, VASH STAMPEDE WOLFWOOD AND WOLFWOODS ARM. Let's get going! It'll be just like the old days, except Sempai isn't here with us.  
  
WW I have an idea my honey. Let's get her to come with us.  
  
MIL Great idea! WITH THAT THEY SKIP OUT THE DOOR LITTLE VASH LAUGHING ALONG WITH THEM  
  
DOM I'm not staying in this hell hole. SHE WALKS OUT THE DOOR BEHIND MILLY AND WW.  
  
MID I'm with you. Maybe now there might be someone out there who actually appreciates the true music of a true musician.  
  
LEG Master? The long treacherous spidery road awaits us.  
  
REM you know Knives. You could always stay here and help me host the show. Hey you could be my co-host!  
  
AS REM SPOKE LEGATO HAD SLIPPED OUT THE DOOR.  
  
KNIVES Slave! Wait for your master! WITH THAT KNIVES BOLTED OUT THE DOOR IN SEARCH OF HIS MISSING BROTHER -end chap 2- Evtsc where oh where could my Vashie be ^^ oh where oh where could he be .^^ Vash come back to me! 


	3. Still No Vashu, but a Bathroom Yes

EVTSC I don't feel like saying the disclaimer today.  
  
.^^ she's sick with a spidery cold.  
  
-_\\ please forgive her illnesses  
  
Stories  
  
EVTSC Legato and Dominique fell out of the jeep but were retrieved. Midvalley has to pee and Vash WW has to make a number 2. Oh, and Rem is still trapped, well remaining inside the set. Now onward and outward to the pointless humor.  
  
Rem: Hello! And welcome! She waves to the lonely camera. Today, I have something very interesting to tell you all. I Rem Ramón Sicily Saverem, am hereby appointing Kuroneko-sama, for those of you who do not know who that is, it is the black cat.  
  
EVTSC Okay! Enough of Rem! Now let's move the focus point to the only important people of this pointless fic.  
  
The rusty brown jeep putted into the town of September. A brown barren wasteland. Just perfect to match the jeep and its dusty inhabitants.  
  
Midvalley: I got first dibs on the bathroom!  
  
Midvalley jumped out of the jeep and grabbed his saxophone, for he never left home without it and ran into the local saloon.  
  
Milly: Darling, help me and Vash Stampede Wolfwood get inside.  
  
WW: No problem my honey.  
  
Legato stared intently at Dominique who was unbuckling her seat belt.  
  
Dom: What are you looking at?  
  
Legato: My tanned demon.  
  
Dominique stunned Legato with her demon's eye and got out of the jeep and entered the saloon.  
  
Legato: Where'd she go?  
  
Knives: What does it matter?  
  
Legato: Mater, we are in a town full of innocent spiders, which you have vowed to destroy.  
  
Knives: what does it matter, Vash isn't around to tell me it is wrong.  
  
Legato: "Okay, you stay here and protect the brown bomber. I shall go in search of my beautiful demon goddess."  
  
Knives: "Right."  
  
Legato bounded like a deer into a forest into the saloon. Knives remained in the jeep.  
  
Milly: "Mr. Knives. Would you like to come in and have a drink? WW-san and I will pay for yours. Legato is worried you might break a sweat out in this heat."  
  
Knives: "I do not sweat. I do not have that pesky problem like spiders."  
  
Milly: Sticks her finger in the air. "You know, Sempai never broke a sweat either, yet Mr. Vash always was so thirsty."  
  
Knives: "Your point?"  
  
WW: "Milly! The baby's crying! Come make it be quiet! I need a drink!"  
  
Milly: "Coming darling!" Milly scurried off inside the saloon the doors swinging from the slight breeze.  
  
Legato was suddenly flying through the air. Knives watched the blue haired spider servant flutter to the ground only to land inches away from the jeep.  
  
Knives: "Spider troubles?"  
  
Legato: "You have no idea."  
  
And so Legato remained seated in front of the jeep, Knives in the passenger seat and the rest inside the saloon. 


	4. Rem is eaten by a pink poofy couch and L...

EVTSC No ownie, ownie.  
  
-_\\ What the beep is no ownie, ownie?  
  
.^^ Vash.?  
  
Legato's Next Door.  
  
EVTSC Dominique booted Legato out of the saloon and tried to boot him out of her life. Midvalley finally got to use the potty and so did little Vash Stampede Wolfwood. Knives still pouts in the jeep. He truly misses our Vashu.  
  
Rem- Well this morning Ksama and I did a thorough remodeling job to the set. (She points to a pink couch and denim blue carpet. The walls are white and a bay window placed in the corner of the stall. ) Isn't it lovely? (She walks to the big poofy pink couch and is swallowed by its stuffing.)  
  
EVTSC And thus Rem was eaten by her couch. Now onward to the good stuff!  
  
(Knives is being baked by the double suns, you can tell b/c he is turning a lovely shade of red, sort of like Vash's coat. Legato has crawled under the jeep, in order to avoid the skin blistering sun, since his skin was oh- so-delicate when it came to things like that. The others were just now making their way out of the saloon.)  
  
Knives~ What took so long? Don't you spiders realize that I must find my brother so I can once again return to my normal state of being? (Knives crossed his arms and the burning rush of pain tingled in his skull)  
  
Mid- What happened to Legato?  
  
Legato- Here I am. -He crawls out from underneath the jeep, skin still its natural creamy color. His long white jacket now a dusty tan color.-  
  
Dom- What happened to you?  
  
Legato- Cupid's evil twin hit me with his arrow of lust. -He looks at his coat then at Dom, his hearts are little eyes- We match! We both have the tanned jacket thing going on for us! I'm just as giddy as a school girl!  
  
WW- O.o The sooner needle-noggin gets back the sooner everything goes back to the way it belongs. (The gang piled into the ever rusting jeep. And WW drove them off down the streets of the dusty ghost town.)  
  
Legato- Dom, can I call you Dom?  
  
Dom- No, only the author of this hair-brained fic, may call me that, for you see she pays my bills. And you, you are repulsive, now if you were more like Midvalley or Knives-sama.  
  
Legato- His eyes all googly and stuff- You know my sweet, sweet object of my lust, I am the Master's servant, his dog-to-call, and I am also Midvalley's commander in chief.  
  
Dom- Don't make me throw you out of this vehicle and make Zazie call the sandworms to eat you.  
  
Legato~ She loves me.  
  
Knives~ (Cringes in pain every time he moves.) Oww.Vashu this is your fault! So come back! Oww (Little Vash is climbing into Knives' lap.)  
  
Milly- No Vash Stampede Wolfwood. Can't you see that Mr. Knives is extremely sunburned? -The small brown haired grey eyed child looked over to his ditzy mother and thought real hard about it.-  
  
Knives- Get your spider child off of me! I am in pain! -As he screamed his pain increased- AAAHHHH  
  
Mid- You know sir, we could have Chapel's pupil stop and purchase a tube of sunburn reliever.  
  
Dom- Midvalley's right Knives-sama.  
  
Knives- Painfully turns his head and looks at the lackey's in the backseat then to the driver- You heard them spider driver. To a pharmacy!  
  
WW- You know if I stop again in such a short amount of time, then it'll take us even longer to find good-old insert explicate words broom head.  
  
Milly- Now, now darling don't use such words around the baby.  
  
WW-Sorry honey.  
  
Milly- Besides, we need to stop because little Vash Wolfwood needs more diapers.  
  
WW-Yes my honey. -WW turned into a local thrift store and cut off the engine-  
  
Knives- Dominique, you shall go in and retrieve the relief that shall sooth the pain of my painful spider caused sunburn.  
  
Milly- Mr. Knives, would mind watching Vash Wolfwood while Mr. Wolfwood and I go inside and purchase some items?  
  
WW-But I could stay here and.  
  
Milly- Gave a certain look at WW- But darling; you have all the money.  
  
WW-Catches on- Oh I do don't I?  
  
-Milly WW Dom and Mid, who Dom drug along, got out of the jeep and entered the thrift store. 20 minutes later-  
  
Legato was playing "This little piggy" with Vash Wolfwood and Knives was still cringing in pain and getting even more sunburn.  
  
Knives- Hurry! My beautiful skin is being ruined every minute you spiders are inside that air cooled building!  
  
-Legato and Vash were giggling b/c Vash and him were now playing peek-a-boo-  
  
-Milly and WW walked out a bag of diapers and goodie's in hand. Dom emerged with a tube of aloe and Mid had a bottle of sun screen-  
  
Dom- Here put this on first. -Hands Knives the sunscreen. He applies it and whimpers when he does. - Now this. -She hands him the aloe. - Only put this on when it burns or stings, and if you begin to get a rash discontinue use.  
  
-They pile into the beat up jeep and head down the dusty street until they reach the outskirts of town.- 


	5. Diaper Change

EVTSC I dO nOt OwN tRiGuN nEvEr HaVe NeVeR WiLl So GeT oVeR iT!.!.  
  
-_\\ Forgive, she has lost all sense of anything.  
  
.^^ Bring back my Vashu!  
  
EVTSC Our special Knives learned for the first time in his life what sunburn is. So they picked him up some aloe and sunscreen for his delicate plant skin. Legato and baby Vash played "This Little Piggy" and "Peek-a- Boo".  
  
Rem~ I was not eaten by the couch! So to bad, so sad, you failed the lab.  
  
K-sama~ Nya? (Lab?)  
  
EVTSC Anyways enough of boring old Rem and now for more of my favorites and yours.  
  
Legato~ Mid, Dom, you guys like me right?  
  
Dom~No. And it's not Dom, it's Dominique.  
  
Legato~ Yes my lust goddess.  
  
Milly~ Vash Wolfwood! You leave Mr. Knives be. Can't you see that he's taking a nap?  
  
Knives~ Control your spider baby. I am trying to nap.  
  
WW~ Knives! Don't call my kid a spider! I don't want him running around with your sick sadistic ideals!  
  
Knives~ Leave the child. It does not bother me. For it reminds me slightly of my own brother.  
  
Milly~ Are you sure Mr. Knives?  
  
Legato~ Never question the master! If this is what his evil heart desires, then this is what he gets!  
  
WW~ .Sure.  
  
Mid~I gotta go again,  
  
WW~ You cant hold it?  
  
Mid~ I cant it stings when I hold it!  
  
Dom~ I have to too. And I just don't feel like waiting.  
  
Milly~ Um.Mr. Wolfwood, I need you to stop also.  
  
Legato~ Hurry! Before I wet myself! Or else I will be forced to pee on your seats!  
  
WW~ Fine. I guess I can stop. (WW pulls the jeep into a small caravan like place and cuts the jeep off and gets out of the jeep and so does its passengers.)  
  
Milly~ Mr. Knives, can you watch Vash Stampede Wolfwood?  
  
Knives~ I suppose. But, hurry. We are in desperate need of finding my only relative.  
  
Milly~ But I thought Rem was your mother?  
  
Knives~ No, she's just a worthless spider that expects us to worship her.  
  
Milly~ Oh. Well if Vash starts to fuss or whatever here is his diaper bag. (She hands Knives' the bag and unzips it.) Here are some bottles and a few diapers, and some toys for him to play with incase he gets bored. Have fun you two! (Milly, Legato, Dom, Mid, and WW enter the tent and Knives looks down at little Vash. He begins to cry. Knives looks at the small spider.)  
  
  
  
Knives~ Ahhhh! Silence spider offspring of a priest and a woman spider who has blond moments. (Little Vash Stampede Wolfwood kept crying. Knives shook him.)  
  
Knives~ Shut up Spider! (That made it worse. So Knives dug around the diaper bag and gave the screaming child spider a toy. Vash looked at it, then tossed it at Knives and cried some more.)  
  
Knives~ What do you need nutrition? (Knives digs around some more in the bag. Finally his hand emerges with a bottle of formula. He gives the bottle to baby Vash. He squeezes the liquid out all over Knives' face. Then begins to holler some more. )  
  
Knives~ Arg! Spider! Hush your mouth! Shut your face! (That made it worse some more. Then Knives thought real hard. And did the last thing he wanted and tried to avoid. He checked the diaper. A horrid putrid smell oozed from it. He began to gag and choke on the smell. The he emptied to contents of the bag into the driver's seat. Grabbed a diaper and many wipes and some powder. )  
  
Knives~ Now, for mission Stinky Vash. (Knives took Vash's pants off and then unstrapped the diaper. An even worse smell blew through the air. )  
  
Knives~ I think I'm going to hurl! (Knives removed the diaper and flung it out to the wind, then he proceeded to wipe the gurgling baby Vash's dirty butt.)  
  
Knives~ Dammit spider! Why must you enjoy my suffering?(Vash Wolfwood only laughed his baby laugh. Knives finished wiping the dookie off of the baby then grabbed a diaper. Little Vash jumped up before Knives could put the diaper on. Little Vash ran around the front seat of the jeep.)  
  
Knives~ Come back here spider brat! (Knives grabbed little Vash's leg and dragged him towards himself. Little Vash laughed. Knives put the diaper only half way on, and then applied the powder causing a fog of smoke, causing them to sneeze and cough.)  
  
Knives~ Dammit. Damn, damn, damn. Why must this cursed spider product!(Vash laughed and began to choke on the powder. Knives finished putting the diaper on Vash at this point in time.)  
  
Knives~Now what is wrong with you?(Little Vash was turning blue.) Spider Shit! You're choking! If you die, Milly will hurt me! And that would be scary! (Knives used the Heimlich maneuver on baby Vash, and baby Vash spit out the lid to the powder dispenser, for it wasn't a big bottle of it. )  
  
Knives~ Great. Now I cannot die. (Baby Vash laughed even more) (Milly and the others walked out of the tent all smiles.)  
  
Knives~ It's about damn time you spiders showed up!  
  
WW~ Knives! Don't call us spiders around my son. And Milly, why did you let Knives watch our child?  
  
Milly~ Well Vash Stampede Wolfwood seems happy. (She snuggles her baby and they all get in the jeep) Did you have any problems Mr. Knives? (Knives just sat in silence as WW pulled the jeep out into the dusty dry desert.) 


	6. Monsoon Season

EVTSC La, la, la..  
  
.^^ VASHU!!!  
  
^^ I think Mr. Knives is actually realizing what the world would be like without Mr. Vash.Sad.  
  
Next Door to You  
  
EVTSC So Knives learned how to deal with a spider child. Amazing, I am truly evil. And I am beginning to think that Dom is about to kill Legato.personally.  
  
Rem| Well yesterday the cat and I read The Cat in The Hat, and did interpretive movement and contemplated on it.  
  
Ksama| Nyaoooo (Save me!)  
  
EVTSC Okay Rem needs therapy. The cat I don't know. Now onward to my pawns.  
  
The jeep putted down the road. Dust spurted out from underneath the tires.  
  
Dom| This dust is beginning to stir up my allergies.  
  
Mid| You mean you, the Cyclops, are allergic to dust?  
  
Leg| My poor longing of my evil blue spiky heart. Allow me to comfort you.  
  
Dom| Touch me and I shall be forced to take your spikes off and cram them in your ears till one pops out the other side with your brain on it.  
  
Mid| Legato just let her be. I do not wish to feel the furry of hell fall down upon us.  
  
Leg| I guess your right.  
  
Kni| Finally silence.  
  
Mil| It sure is hot out here. I wish I had some water.  
  
WW| Not for another 100 miles, sorry my honey.  
  
Leg| Cant you pull some out from inside your magical pockets?  
  
WW| They don't work that way.  
  
Leg| Total disappointment.  
  
Mil| Yeah.  
  
Leg| It's hot.  
  
Dom| Shut up.  
  
Rem| You know back where I came from it used to rain, now that I have been cursed to remain on this desert planet. Darn you Knives. Darn you a lot!  
  
EVTSC Rem go back to your cave!!  
  
Rem| You never let me have any fun  
  
EVTSC NOW!!! (Rem crawls back to her cave) Now continue puppets!!  
  
Kni| I think that spider has taken it to far.  
  
Leg| Ya! Down with Rem!!!  
  
Kni| Not that spider, but the author spider. And Rem human trash too.  
  
Leg| Ahh.  
  
Dom| Hurry and get back to script b/f we get fired.  
  
Mid| Alright.  
  
Leg| What's rain?  
  
Kni| Its when water falls in droplets from the cloud filled sky and wets the ground and everything. It is quite refreshing.  
  
Mil| Gee sounds fun.I wish that would happen.  
  
WW| And how would you know what its like?  
  
Kni| b/c while I spent my time on that cursed seed ship, Vash..Vash and I were in the rec. room and that distasteful woman Rem caused the ceiling or well sky to rain upon us.and my dumb brother was gleeful and I was soaked. Cold, wet, and angry. Rem laughed at my suffering.  
  
Mil| Poor Mr. Knives. But I still wish it would. It would be nice.  
  
Leg| maybe a little scary.  
  
Dom| what a wimp.  
  
WW| Uh.why did the sky just all of a sudden turn black.?  
  
They all look at the sky. A loud roar of thunder breaks the sound barrier.  
  
Leg| Ahh!! (He jumps into Dom's lap.)  
  
Dom| Get off or feel my wrath. (She tosses him onto Mid's lap.)  
  
Leg| Hello. How are you?  
  
Mid| Freak!!! (He tosses him into his own seat) Now stay!  
  
Drops of water begin to fall.  
  
Mil| What's this?  
  
WW| I'd assume this is rain.  
  
Leg| This is nice.  
  
The rain drops become larger and more intense.  
  
Mid| Is it supposed to do this?  
  
Kni| Unfortunately it can.  
  
The road no longer spat dust but large clumps of mud. One of those blobs of mud smack Legato in the only visible eye he has. He screams.  
  
Leg| I'm blind I'm blind! Oh great cheesecake gods I've gone blind!  
  
Dom| No you didn't wipe your eyes.  
  
Leg| Oh, you're right.  
  
WW| I don't think this can get any better.  
  
The road, ground, whatever you choose, the newly beaten path, is a flooded river. The wheels no longer touch the ground. So they take Legato's spikes and turn them into paddles.  
  
Leg| Why'd you take my spikies.? I miss them.  
  
WW| Would you rather be the oar?  
  
Leg| (thinks real hard) I suppose I wouldn't.  
  
WW| Fine, now you understand.  
  
The rain is getting worse. The rusted jeep is getting even more of a rust build up on it. Added to that that the jeep is quickly filling with water.  
  
Mid| Every body bail!!  
  
Leg| Do not worry my evil goddess I shall save thee!!  
  
Dom| Please don't! I can swim!  
  
Leg| Well I cant!! (He begins to drown)  
  
Mid| I shall save him.b/c if I don't then I wont have anyone else to watch Dom beat up.  
  
Mid swims to Legato and pulls him above the water.  
  
WW| Come one my honey, get the kid. (He pulls them up onto his cross punisher. Then Knives pulls himself onto an end of it. Dom crawls out of the water on it.)  
  
Mid| got room for one more? (He comes swimming up dragging Legato by the collar.)  
  
WW| Sure.  
  
Mid gets on and grabs his sax. The gang begins to have a lovely discussion about the double suns. Legato is whining and stuff.  
  
Leg| Come on.Let me on!  
  
WW| No more room.  
  
WW & Milly sat on the rocket launcher portion. Mid sat on one of the hand gun sides. Knives and Vash Stampede Wolfwood sat on the other. Dom sat on the rocket launcher side. Legato doggie paddled along side.  
  
Mil| Mr. WW, we just cant let him stay in the water.  
  
WW| Why not?  
  
Mil| B/c he might catch a cold.  
  
WW| Fine.  
  
Leg| Where do you want me to go?  
  
Mid| The only place available.  
  
Legato looks to Dom. Hearts for eyes once again. He climbs up and perches himself closely at her side.  
  
Leg| We meet again my wonderful goddess.  
  
Dom| I hate rain.  
  
And so our wet drippy friends sailed off into the sunset on the punisher. 


	7. Lovers and Spilt Tea

EVTSC Beef it's what's for dinner.  
  
-_\\ dun dun dun  
  
.^^ Almost to Vash's location!  
  
Legato's Next Door.  
  
EVTSC It rained! Actually it was more like a monsoon. Strange. What's next donuts from heaven? Or pudding rocks?  
  
Rem Yesterday Ksama and I had a heart to heart discussion about flowers. The cat proclaimed that they had no meaning. I said that.  
  
EVTSC No~ I don't feel like letting my viewers.err uh.readers.listen to such audacity. Now onward to the craziness I like to call Trigun fanness.  
  
The jeep putted down the dehydrated ground. Legato was sipping rain water from his bunny fru fru. Mid played his sax, which was just a bit soggy. Dom sat there trying to dry her hair and stuff by standing in the jeep letting the dry heated air blow through it. Knives sat and pouted as baby Vash S.WW climbed on him like a jungle gym. Milly was snuggled against WW sleeping. And WW was driving the heap of rust.  
  
Mid Something doesn't seem right.  
  
Dom What Legato isn't rambling?  
  
Leg I'm sipping tea. Thank you.  
  
WW Where'd you get tea?  
  
Leg From that massive amounts of water from the sky. Along with it came a box of tea bags, some tea cakes, and these lovely little bunt cakes.  
  
Mil Don't worry I can handle a bunt cake and ice cream.  
  
Kni Sure. Now let us move forward and upward from this location.  
  
Mil Let's go to where Meryl Sempai works!!  
  
Leg Yes, maybe we shall find Masters brother there with that repulsive rank human.  
  
Kni Yes, maybe my brother's lover shall know of his whereabouts.  
  
WW lover?  
  
Mil You didn't know Mr. Wolfwood?  
  
Leg Yes, but it was only a one night stand for them both.  
  
Dom I think it drove her crazy.  
  
Mid Or made Vash love her more.  
  
Kni She drove him away!  
  
Leg We shall hurt that wicked pmsie human filth!  
  
Kni You do that an then Vash will never come back!  
  
Dom he has a point.  
  
WW We only have five more minutes till we're there  
  
Mil We're on our way! We can close the distance! We don't care how far! Someday he'll be strong. We know every trial will be worth his while. We can go everywhere and we know we don't belong.  
  
Mid ::Finishes playing the tune to Hercules I Can Go The Distance On his sax.:: Beautiful.Just beautiful.  
  
Dom Wow.  
  
Leg Now.What shall we do when we reach the scary boring meister?  
  
Kni We shall fear her!  
  
WW Who fears her?  
  
Mil All fear the Meryl Meister.  
  
All cower in fear at the name of Meryl. Unless Vash was here then he would be swooning over it.  
  
Kni I miss Vash!! Bring him back Meryl monster!  
  
WW Right. (He looked straight ahead and noticed the town sign.)  
  
Mil We're almost there! YAY!!  
  
Leg Cheers everyone!  
  
He passes out some tea cups filled to the brim with tea. They clank their cups together and Legato spills his tea all over his crotch.  
  
Leg It burns! It burns!! Quick save my man hood!  
  
Dom (watches and tries really hard not to laugh)  
  
Leg AAAAHHHHGGG!! The pain!! I cant take the pain!  
  
Kni Be a man or I shall be forced to kick you out of the Gun-Ho's.  
  
Mid Yeah, then he could make me commander! And you shall be nothing.  
  
Leg No not that! Please master! Don't do this to me.  
  
Dom Well if he looses something there then he wont be much of a man then will he.  
  
Kni You have a point. Legato. Save yourself.  
  
WWHurry it up too. We're almost there.  
  
Leg (Is using his extra pair of boxers, since he chooses not to wear any, to wipe at his spill.)  
  
Mil Sempai!!  
  
The rusty jalopy putted down the street then died in front of Bernardelli. Milly jumped out and grabbed Vash S.WW and WW's arm and drug them all inside Bernardelli.  
  
EVTSC Don't worry I shall get Vash in here within 2 episodes. Then we'll get our favorite blond spiky haired donut eating guy. Trust me on this  
  
.^^ Don't she was the one who took away my brother.  
  
-_\\ It was for the best.  
  
.^^ Insubordination! 


	8. MERYL MEISTER RETURNS!

EVTSC I hate my computer.  
  
.^^ Blow it to smithereens  
  
-_\\ Computer chunkies any one?  
  
EVTSC ok last time they arrived at the Bernardelli Company. Now they shall go and retrieve Meryl and have her help guide them on their journey/quest to find Vash.  
  
REM Well folks I decided that I am going to quit, b/c I do not get enough air time! So when they bring back my boss, I shall hand in my resume. Thank you.  
  
KSAMA Nyao.  
  
EVTSC Bye-bye Rem!  
  
Inside Bernardelli. Meryl is sitting at her desk typing a report on something.  
  
MIL Sempai!! Meryl Sempai!!  
  
Meryl looks up from her typewriter  
  
MER Milly? =WW walks in behind Milly he is holding a baby Knives, Legato, Dom, and Mid all follow.= What are they doing here? Don't tell me they want a job here.  
  
MIL No Meryl. We came to get you.  
  
MER Why?  
  
KNI We need you to aid us in finding my brother! =Knives drops down to his knees in front of the almighty Meryl Meister.= Please lend us your guidance and assistance!  
  
MER Uh.Knives? Why are you wrapped around my leg?  
  
WW Yeah, that's Needle-Noggin's job.  
  
MIL Eh-herm!  
  
WW Oh.sorry.  
  
MIL Sempai, please help us find Mr. Vash. Because if we don't find him soon Mr. Knives will loose his sanity.  
  
DOM What little he has left.  
  
MID At least it's more than Legato has.  
  
LEG What's that supposed to mean?  
  
DOM/MID Nothing.  
  
MER Anyways! Why do you need my help? Like I'd want to go find Vash.  
  
KNI But my dim-witted brother really liked you spider.and now he's gone.  
  
LEG We figured he was here with his human lover.  
  
MER Who told you!!?? I mean.That never happened.uh.  
  
WW Vash talks in his sleep.  
  
MER But.b-b-b-b-b..  
  
MIL Meryl-Sempai..cant you just admit it.?  
  
MER Milly I have no idea what you are talking about.  
  
LEG Denial a beautiful thing.  
  
KNI Please Meryl Meister!! Please help us get Vash back!! HE IS PLEADING NOW.  
  
MER Knives get up and never do that again.  
  
KNI Promise you will help us get Vash back!! HE PLEADS EVEN MORE  
  
MER Knives get up you are scaring me and all the children.  
  
KNIVES LOOKS AROUND. EVERYONE IS STARING HORRIFIED AT HIM  
  
MER See. Now get up.  
  
KNI This means you shall help me?  
  
MER Yes if you get up this instant! SHE IS LOOKING VERY SCARY  
  
LEG No wonder Vash feared you.  
  
MID You don't?  
  
LEG I fear no.MERYL GLARES AT HIM.uh.HE TWIDDLES HIS THUMBS.  
  
MIL YAY!! Now all we have left is to find Mr. Vash, then the whole gang will be together!!  
  
THEY ALL LEAVE THE COMPANY GET IN THE JEEP WHICH WW KICKED TO MAKE IT WORK AGAIN AND DROVE OFF IN THE DIRECTION MERYL TOLD THEM TO GO.  
  
EVTSC Sorry it took so long.to many test.my computer kept dying.  
  
-_\\ She was going to blow it up.  
  
EVTSC I've been writing/drawing a comic.  
  
.^^ And trying to clean the bomb shelter 


	9. The Stench of Donuty DonutsCould They Ha...

EVTSC: After a long long time I have returned. YAY!! Well shall we go and get Vash back and see the conclusion to this? yes? HERE WE GO mind you Trigun aint mine Im mine yes but Trigun...no...*shakes head no*  
  
*In a hunk of junk jeep driving down the desert road they come to this town full of nothing*  
  
Meryl: Great just great. You drag me away from my job to the middle of nowhere to a run down boondocks sort of town. Damn you all.  
  
Knives: *sniffs the air* I smell...I smell...I smell...  
  
*Milly looks to him*  
  
Milly: What is it you smell Mr. Knives? Pudding?   
  
Legato: Baby filth?  
  
Dom: Legato?  
  
Legato: You love my scent you really do! *leans against Dominique who then punches Legato to knock him out of the jeep.*  
  
Mid: Yes my leader what is it you smell?  
  
WW: Everyone's rank B.O.?  
  
Knives: *glares at WW* No priestly spider. I smell DONUTS!   
  
Milly: Donuts. Oh goody I am quite hungry. Honey cant we go get some? Maybe they will have pudding filled ones? *She looks at WW with pleading eyes*   
  
WW: *sighs* fine fine lets go. *he cuts the jeep off and jumps out grabbing his cross.* Lets go ya buncha pantiewastes.  
  
Milly: Mr. Priest!?  
  
WW: *sighs* sorry hun.  
  
Knives: Ahaha Priest boy is getting scolded by a female spider! *points and laughs*  
  
Meryl: *comes up behind Knives and bashes his head with her fist* shut up and lets go.  
  
Dom: I'll stay here and watch the jeep.  
  
Mid: I'll aid her in the jeep watching.  
  
WW: Fine. lets go and get this over with. Hopefully there will be a bar in here so I can get plastered.  
  
*The group of Trigun-y Trigun people walk into the empty town. A strong scent of donuts flowing through the breeze.*  
  
Legato: It reaks of donuts. Why can it not reak of cheesecake or hotdogs...? *daydreams of dancing cheesecakes and hotdogs that torture people*  
  
Meryl: Shut up spike boy and walk faster! *she stepped on the back of his heels*  
  
Legato: Damn you Damn you I say That hurt! *whine whine*  
  
Knives: I smell this donut-y smell strongly over this way...*he takes off running (like a girl) in the direction he pointed*  
  
WW: *snickers* hahah he runs like a girl!  
  
Milly: How embarassing...  
  
Meryl: Tell me about it. *shakes her head in utter disbelief* Who knew the slayer of all man kind ran like a little girl.  
  
Legato: Do not mock my Master so. *causes WW to choke hismelf*  
  
Meryl: Stop it you moron. *smacks Legato in the back of the head*  
  
Legato: Owies...that hurt me...*his "eye" waters up*  
  
Meryl: Pansie.  
  
Knives: Hurry you spidery spider people get ye hence this way!  
  
Milly: What is he talking about?  
  
Meryl: He said *mocking Knives* get over here.   
  
WW: That wasnt a very good Knives impression.  
  
Meryl: shut up cross boy.   
  
*The group of oddly cups of teas walk over to where Knives is bellowing from*  
  
Meryl: What is it...you...*stares in disbelief*  
  
WW: Plant boy number 1 what the hell do you want?   
  
Knives: Lookit!! *points at the sign*  
  
VASH'S DONUT EMPORIUM  
  
Legato: My co-host? We have found him? *falls to his knees* Why!? WHY!?  
  
Milly: Oh look someone else named Vash owns a donut shop.  
  
*They all sweatdrop and fall to the ground*   
  
Knives: Finally after years of searching!  
  
WW: What it was only 1 month maybe more?  
  
Milly: Actually Mr. Knives is close with the years thing it was only a year...  
  
Meryl: Anyways *pushes her way to the door* Can we get this over with? So I can go back to my job?  
  
Knives: Yes slave driving spider. *pouts then walks to the door*  
  
*They all stand at the door waiting for some one to open it in disbelief...*  
  
Could they have actually found Vash or is it an imposter...Tune in next time to find out...  
  
EVTSC: Yes I know I know I said Vash would be here soon, but it didnt turn out that way...but maybe next time ahahah. But seriously I this thing almost finised and my pc crashed and died and I had to get a new one...It totally blows  
  
.\\\ : The horror oh the humanity  
  
.^^ You mean the spiderity 


	10. Vash and Knives Get a Nose Bleedaka VASH...

EVTSC: Ya know?  
  
-----------------------------------------------------  
  
-Our friends are standing outside the door of Vash's Donut Emporium-  
  
Knives: I cant take the insanity of this anymore!  
  
-Knives bursts through the saloon style doors-  
  
Legato: Master wait for me!   
  
-Legato follows suit as do the rest all landing in a pile on the floor-  
  
Knives: Get of me you spidery spider morons  
  
-Knives crawls out from underneath the pile of sweaty, dusty human bodies-  
  
Knives: VASH!!!!!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU I KNOW YOU ARE IN HERE I KNOW YOU CANT STAND TO BE FAR FROM A ROOM FULL OF DONUTS! VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
-Meryl stands up knocking the others off of her as she does-  
  
Meryl: Stupid plant boy does it look like broom head is here? I mean the place is still packed full of donuts so that means he hasnt been here yet.  
  
-She glares at Knives and goes to smack him upside the head when a man with blond spikey hair and a red jacket walks into the room a box of donuts in arm-  
  
Knives: VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!!!!   
  
-Knives lunges at Vash and goes to pummel him but Vash dodges allowing Knives to fall into a barrel of butter-  
  
WW: Needle Noggin!!!   
  
Vash: Wolfwood? What the?  
  
Milly: Mr. Vash! Mr. Vash!   
  
Vash: Milly!?  
  
Legato: I have found you Vash the Stampede  
  
Vash: Damnit Legato quit being such a freak.  
  
Meryl: Vash? Where the bloody hell have you been?  
  
Vash: Meryl-chan!   
  
-He throws himself to Meryl's waist and attaches himself to her clinging and not letting go-   
  
Meryl: -Vein throbbing- Vash get the hell off me. -She tries to push him off but he has a death grip to her skirt-  
  
Knives: VAAAAAAASH! Why'd you leave me with those miserable spidery spider like people?!?  
  
-Knives crawls to Vash and drags him off of Meryl, and in Vash's hands Meryl's skirt and such leaving her in her blue smilie face panties-  
  
Meryl: -blushes and wraps her cape around her as Vash and Knives begin to have a nose bleed- You two are such perverts! -she walks away from the twins-  
  
------------------------------------------------------  
  
oki so I stop here for now maybe later tonight I'll write more but at least Vash is back ya know? 


End file.
